1858: The Witches of Lefame: A Pastoral Masque
Composed by Lord Alban Fitzartur (1858)
Dramatis Personae
* DUKE ORLUNO — Ruler of Lefame, haunted by visions of virtue.
* ART — A restless ghost, once a painter, now condemned to inspire mortals.
* MAB — Queen of Mischief, quicksilver spirit of moonlight and mockery.
* THE WITCHES OF LEFAME — Six beautiful men, sworn to the creed of honest desire.
- PERRIN, LYDON, RUSSELL, GILES, NICK, and SWANNUS.
* CHORUS OF NAKED SWANS — Attendants upon virtue, ever bathing, ever gossiping.
* BEASTS MYTHICAL AND OTHER — A unicorn that quotes Plato; a bear enamoured of verse; two satyrs competing in modesty.
Scene I — A Beach on the Isle of Lefame
(Moonlight. The swans preen themselves and argue morality.)
First Swan. O brothers, what’s virtue but the freedom to float unclad?
Second Swan. Virtue, say I, is a well‑feather’d backside viewed at sunrise.
Third Swan. Then we are saints entire!
(Enter MAB, dancing above the surf.)
Mab. Peace, peacocks of purity! Yon tides grow jealous of your polish. I bring news: the Duke shall wed to‑morrow, a thing both lawful and lamentable.
First Swan. Mab, why lament the lawful?
Mab. Because lawful love is ever half‑dressed.
(Music of pipes. Swans caper. ART the Ghost arises, transparent, clutching a painter’s brush.)
Art. What mortals call corruption, I call colour! The soul in greys is half‑alive.
Mab. Ghost of pigment, why haunt our isle?
Art. To teach these lovely witches that honesty and appetite are kin.
Scene II — The Grove of Witches
(Enter six witches, shirtless, garlanded in herbs.)
Perrin. Brothers, what new sermon whispers that pleasure is sin?
Lydon. The priests on the mainland. They would ban our bathing as lewd display.
Russell. Let them! We are decadent — which word, says the ghost, doth mean incorruptible in delight.
Giles. Amen to incorruption!
(Enter Mab and Art.)
Mab. Fair witches, teach the Duke this lesson: that goodness and luxury are twins long parted.
Art. Decadence is no disease but health unashamed. Paint your ethics bright!
Nick. Shall we dance him to conviction?
Swannus. A dance unclothed is argument enough.
(They dance. Thunder of laughter. A unicorn peeps through the leaves.)
Unicorn. Gentlemen, modesty is over‑rated. A pure horn needs no curtain.
Mab. Hark, even beasts preach virtue! This island shall be canonised for its pleasure.
Scene III — The Duke’s Court, Next Morning
(Enter DUKE ORLUNO, attended by clerics.)
Duke. What riot was this that shook my dreams? Methought my virtue juggled with a ghost.
(ART appears.)
By Heav’n! the same pale painter!
Art. My lord, your virtue’s colours fade. You starve the spirit with too much fasting. Look to the witches of your isle; they feast and yet offend not Heaven.
Duke. Witches? Men who bathe by moonlight?
Mab. Men who dare be honest.
(The witches enter, radiant. Swans trail behind scattering feathers.)
Perrin. Kneel not before us, sire; stand with us bare!
Duke. Bare?
Lydon. In truth, your Grace—unclad of hypocrisy.
Duke. If this be witchcraft, bless me, for I feel it good.
(All sing a madrigal on the theme that pleasure is the soul’s true cleanliness.)
Chorus of Swans:
White be our feathers, white be our sin,
Where joy is honest, the heart is thin
Between the world and Heaven’s grin!
(The unicorn blesses them; ART dissolves in sunrise.)
Art. My work is done; the brush is flesh again. Let every man be his own masterpiece.
(Thunder of applause from invisible spirits. MAB closes the masque.)
Mab. Thus ends the dream of Lefame, where witches prove saints, ghosts preach ethics, and the only evil is dullness. Now wake, dear audience, and sin—but virtuously.
(Exeunt omnes in a whirl of laughter, feathers, and light.)
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